baru ku sedari

Hari ni baru mula balik ada rasa semangat nak continue tulis something

in this blog after sekian lama menyepikan diri. Baru teringat actually that

i do have a blog rather than DO i have a BLOG?? orang kata lepas lama x menulis and asyik mendiamkan diri, banyak perubahan dalam diri berjaya diobserve and might be boleh share sedikit sebanyak dengar orang yang sudi membaca. apa2 hal sekalipun tujuan tulis blog ni waktu2 pagi yang sepi and kedinginan angin malam ni dapat la menceritakan tentang2 anjakan paradigma yang da berlaku. so minta maaf kalau ada yang baca rasa macam what kind of bullshit is this or so on sebab mood pagi2 ni rasa macam nak bercerita. :) please bare with me for a while.

Kehidupan di UTP memang sangat2 dibencikan for me after ive stayed here for 3 months. its not like that im not grateful enough for being here. its just that sometimes the system makes u feel like u dont want to comply with it. Not the only reason of the poor management, ive been treating (i used it here as i because not everyone might feel the same as i do) like i dont pay a single cent for study-ing here eventhough that i actually do pay every semester just that i have to return the payment by working and bonded with petronas for a duration of 10 years!

But most of the management and lecturer might not realize about it and keep on saying u all got a scholer from petronas and u dont deserve to say anything. ure being sponsered! who care if i got a sponsorship or not and if they really realized about it, we are talking about money and we have the right on every single money that we pay! lets say worst scenario happens where im not employed by Petronas and i have to pay for the money since its not full scholarship (convertable loan). i still have to pay the money and that means im paying it on my own. but what do i get for paying things that doesnot satisfied me for the money that is spent. Most of UTPian doesnt care much about it. but for me, its a big matter.

second thing is that UTP is such a small campus and the faculty here is only limited to 8 faculties consist of civil, mechanical, electrical, chemical, petroleum, geoscience, Business and Information communication technology. so the number of student is not that much as other university have. if for other universities it is quite accepted for me if they are not managed well enough because of the population is huge. but in UTP, eventhough the population is small compare to other universities, still sadly to say the performance is not up to the standard. i thought that when we deal with smaller number of population it is better and easier to manage rather than have to deal with huge population. and guess what the assumption is totally wrong!

third thing is that the mindset of the people here that like to bother what others people do makes me tired and sick of it. seems busy body to know everysingle thing that we do in daily life. yes i know some people will say that they are being busybody because they concern about us but if im not mistaken now we are big enough to deal with everysingle aspect in this life. if they are too busy body about other people's business then why dont they care about theirselves in the first place. it is not wrong to do that if and only if that we have managed ourself well enough and every single weakness that we hold has been fixed first. then after that if they want to do it, with all due respect please continue with this attitude. No one's going to blame u for helping other people.

hargh! basically that is what i feel and i dont know what other people think about it. i dont quite care on what people thinks about me pon sebab for me sekarang everyone is big enough to think wisely and otak yang dikurniakan kepada setiap insan tu sama. kalau komputer dibina berasaskan otak manusia, kenapa kita x boleh gunakan kepakaran otak yang diberikan untuk berfikir sejenak yang mana elok dan mana tidak. Akal yang bezakan antara manusia dan haiwan. haiwan pun ada otak tapi x mampu berfikir. Manusia pula dikurniakan akal dan fikiran dalam membantu menaikkan ketamadunan dan memperbaiki kehidupan. kalau akal tidak digunakan dan kita tidak berfikir, apa yang membezakan kita dan haiwan?

p/s : kalau kita malas berfikir, lama2 nanti karat and sebab da karat, mula la kita bercakap bende2 yang sungguh membosankan dan x masuk akal. jadi GUNAKAN LAH OTAK KITA :)